What up nerds. As promised, here is part deux of my interview with Mr. Hess. You know I had to put him through the 21 question routine. Nobody is safe…
FreshNerd: Invent a new word.
FreshNerd: You’re on a raft. Jose and Kent are overboard drowning. You can only save one of them. Who do you save?
Derek: I’ll save Jose, my dog. Kent he’s a good guy but he’ll eventually be bought out by somebody with payola.
FN: Carol Brady from the Brady Bunch or Blanche from the Golden Girls?
Derek: Carol…she’s a dirty girl. Have you ever seem her on interviews?!?…..aww man!
FN: Rock and Roll is…..
Derek: Here to stay
FN: When was the last time you set a personal goal?
Derek: 2 days ago.
FN: What, if anything, do you actively boycott?
Derek: Dominos Pizza because they’re pro life. Heinz ketchup as well…
FN: What non-essential item do you always carry with you?
Derek: Listerine strips
FN: How many sketches do you do per week on average?
FN: Describe your year in 2008?
FN: What would you say to John McCain if you ran into him on an elevator?
Derek: “Can I borrow a dollar?”
FN: What is your favorite curse word?
Derek: “Oh God damn!”
FN: That recurring dream you have, what is it about?
Derek: My dad is running from a shark.
FN: If you had to rename “Please God Save Us”, what would you call it?
Derek: “Please God Save Us From Your Followers”
FN: Without art, the world would’ve never witnessed….
FN: When was the last time you spoke to yourself out loud?
Derek: 20 minutes ago
FN: When was the last time you went a full day without checking your email?
Derek: A month ago
FN: What advice do you have for the best artist alive?
Derek: Don’t be cocky
FN: You must give a lecture on a topic you know nothing about. What topic do you choose?
Derek: Being a cocky guy
FN: Do you believe in aliens?
FN: If yes, when was the last time you saw one?
Derek: I have never seen an alien.
FN: Have you heard from Pete from Fall Out Boy since you handed him the copy of “Please God Save Us”?
Derek: I haven’t heard from Pete since…